


Beneath the Shadows - Lie Lavender Skies

by AnnaleighIvy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Sidekicks, Sirens, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:15:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25828789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaleighIvy/pseuds/AnnaleighIvy
Summary: “Why are you looking at me like that?” – Her brow shoots up involuntarily.“Sometimes I forget that you are still just a child…” – He shakes his head in disbelief, not expecting her deep sigh that follows.“Sometimes … I do too…”  - Her pained gaze catches his for a moment as the words linger between them.“He didn’t break you, you know. You are stronger than you think…” – He tries to assure her. Her sight goes unfocused.“You’re wrong, he did… and he had to…”And it was then that he remembered when it had happened. When he had witnessed the pain and despair in her eyes… and how it turned into stone-cold hatred.
Relationships: Severus Snape/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	1. A Door that was Ajar

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first try at a Fan-fiction including the original character Léah, a character that has often visited me in my dreams and whose story I finally wanted to share.  
> I guess she is sort of an alter ego through which I escaped into the world of Harry Potter since I first read it as a child and her story has evolved with and within me ever since. This is also why the depiction of a "Siren" is very much based on my imagination as a twelve year old.
> 
> This is by far not the finished result and also not perfected in any way as I have so much more to say (so even the first chapters are bound to change somewhat still) but I really wanted to put this draft of an idea out there to see if anyone would relate, enjoy or immerse. (Also English isn't my first language so I apologize for any mistakes in advance and I promise to work on my storytelling everyday).
> 
> To everyone who takes their time to witness Léah's journey alongside me, thank you so much even if it is just for the first few sentences. Feel free to leave any sort of feedback. I hope I can conjure some joy with my words for you.
> 
> Lots of Love,  
> Annaleigh <3

Suddenly and abruptly she awoke, an empty feeling crawling its way from her tense heart up to her tight throat. It took her just a moment now to swallow it back down and remember where she was. In a room with way too high of a ceiling in Grimmauld Place no 12 she shared with Hermione and Ginny.  
Both of them must have already gone downstairs for breakfast and Léah was thankful they had granted her a little extra time of thoughtless bliss.  
When she entered the kitchen though – swift and silent as a cat – Remus was the only one sitting at the table, buried nose deep in the Daily Prophet.  
>>What could they possibly write that would be so interesting, I wonder…<< she teasingly asked as she sat down on the space next to him. If she startled him, he didn’t let it show. He greeted her with a somewhat shy but warm smile and lowered the paper.  
>>Nothing really, but as it is, repression painted in stupidity is rather captivating.<< he says, absentmindedly pouring her a cup of tea. She breathes in deep. Lavender. Her favourite. >>Thanks.<<  
Léah felt him studying her from the side and there it was again. This weird tension between them. Him, wanting to talk about what happened at the end of the last school year but also not being quite sure how to start as to not intrude. Her, being willing to talk, maybe even admitting to herself that she needed to, but refusing to be a burden to someone she had absolutely no right being a burden to.  
They both have had a foot in this almost-father-daughter dynamic for the past year and a half and silently agreed that Remus was to her what her father could never be and Léah to him what he never dared to have himself. But bonds formed in silence apparently reached their limits when it came to situations like these, both parties never quite sure when they’d be overstepping never-talked-about boundaries.  
She looked at him, a mixture of desperation and apology almost making her silver eyes water.  
In an act of gathering courage, Remus straddled the bench now, facing her. Breathing out slowly she covered her tea cup with her always cold hands in an attempt to warm and distract.  
>>Léah… I want you to know, that I am here for you. I am sorry that I haven’t said this to you sooner, but… to be honest I was scared and selfish. I am not very good at this whole thing.<< he gestured vaguely at the two of them, hovering his hand over hers for a moment but then retrieving.  
When she spoke, her voice was thin, weighed down by pain, heavy with bitterness, a trait that loomed over her ever since that night in Moody’s office with Harry and Barty Crouch Jr.. >>I know. You don’t have to be sorry, Remus… I-<< she didn’t know what to say. Now he did put his hand on her forearm. Light but steadying.  
>>We don’t have to talk about what exactly happened just yet, if you don’t feel ready. Just know, that I am. But I feel we have to talk about the other … situation.<< Léah couldn’t help herself but to snort at this pathetic euphemism. She couldn’t blame him, really. >>You mean the ‘me turning into a bloodthirsty monster situation’?! Yeah. Bummer to be honest. I really thought this could be a fun ride.<< Instead it had to be painful as hell, as if it wasn’t bad enough already like it was. And dark humoured sarcasm was the only way she knew how to deal with the situation. That or brooding silence. It didn’t seem to have the same effect on Remus though, as he winced at her words like they stung.  
>>Don’t say that.<< But it is true. She didn’t say anything however, just squeezed his hand that still rest comforting on her forearm with her own, now warm from the heat of the teacup.  
>>Are you experiencing any pain yet?<< he asked matter-of-factly as though she was just his student again. Removing his hand and crossing his arms.  
>>No.<< it wasn’t quite the truth but she didn’t feel she lied either. She just wouldn’t consider the occasional dull pain in her jaw to be painful, especially knowing that it really wasn’t compared to what would come. Remus wasn’t satisfied with that answer what so ever, if the disbelieving raise of an eyebrow was anything to go by, so she added: >>Well, not really, but for the past week I occasionally had a light headache. But it’s really not that bad yet.<<  
>>Yet…<< he echoed, for now not feeling the need to press her any further. And after that it felt as though a door, that had been ajar before, now was wide open again, both of them knowing the first steps were taken and relieved at the ease that filled their bond once more.

//

As if to mock Léah’s words from earlier, making them a delirious declaration of stupid naivety, she woke from a sharp and shrill pain in her jaw that shot from her head right down her spine that following night. A chocked scream shook her body to the core. When she felt burning acid creep its way from her heart upward, she tried to sit up. Her body cramped unnaturally and she fell out of the bed to her knees. Faintly she realized something moving in the bed next to hers and could barely hear somebody speak. But the pain made her ears ring, she couldn’t understand what they were saying.  
Another wave of pain hit her, another scream made its way up her sore throat, this time chocked by the need to vomit, she could barely hold herself together. Léah thought she might pass out and secretly wished for that blissful unconsciousness.  
Somebody grabbed her tight by elbow and shoulder and practically pulled her into the adjacent bathroom.  
That somebody held her hair back and patted the space between her shoulder blades for what it seemed like hours while Léah continuously and viciously vomited into the toilet. Blood and black goo and pain and pain and pain. So much pain. All the while the sharp sensation was drilling its way into her skull, convincing her, her head was about to explode. She could’ve sworn, she heard the disgusting sound of bones cracking and grinding against each other as they rearranged themselves in a torturous manner.

Not only were hear ears still ringing, her sight was blurred by her watering eyes and her whole body was tingling, so she couldn’t really feel anything. It seemed like her body was hovering in nothing while simultaneously being stabbed with hundreds of thousands of knives. Robbed of her senses, the only thing she could hold onto was that omnipresent pain, the only thing allowing her to see life at the end of this darkness was the reassurance of almost dying, while certainly not being there quite yet. 

>>…-here me? Léah-<< after a while, words started to seep through to her and she recognized Hermione’s voice. The vomiting had stopped and now she could feel her hands gripping tightly onto the cold porcelain of the toilet, panting irregularly.  
A larger, more calloused hand gently took hold of her chin and brought her back to reality in an instant. Every sound clearer, every visual louder she felt as though a veil had been lifted and time sped up again. She heard her own breath hitch and go flat. But then her eyes found a warm gaze. Remus. >>Remus.<< she said, her words almost inaudible. He held her face as he carefully wiped her face clean witch a lukewarm cloth. Behind them, Hermione flushed and closed the toilet.  
She took Léah by the elbows and with Remus’ help they manoeuvred her onto the toilet seat. 

>>Well, fuck.<< Léah said after a few silent moments, her voice already a bit firmer and she heard how Hermione let out a breath of relief, smoothing down her friend’s hair. >>You are back, oh God… that was-<< she said almost amused in a sort of desperate way, not quite sure how to describe what she had witnessed.  
>>Is my head cracked in half? It sure felt like it…<< she asked in a half-hearted attempt to joke but also somewhat honestly concerned that this was exactly what had happened. Scared what she would find, she hesitantly touched her face and head. She winced, still painfully sensitive to touch but also relieved because her head seemed to be whole at last.  
>>Not quite, but-<< Remus, still one hand on her chin, put the cloth in the sink next to them and raised his hand to her lips, >>May I?<< he asked, she nodded. He lifted her upper lip with his thumb with the look of a professor examining a rather rare specimen of a magical being on his face. >>As I thought. You lied to me. You must have had severe pain for at least four days. If you had told me, I could have made this a lot less painful, Léah.<< he scolded her, disappointment in his voice but sympathy in his gaze. Or rather pity.  
Confused Léah placed her hand where his was and felt up her gums – ignoring the pain – and her upper row of teeth. Her eyes widened when she ran her index finger over a set of way too sharp teeth and it didn’t stop her shock, that she felt the same thing on her left side when she added the other hand.  
Still weak in the knees she stood up, staggering and propped herself up on the rim of the sink to look in the mirror.  
She lifted up her upper lip again and couldn’t believe what she saw: not only where her incisors a little, but still noticeably, longer than normal and sharp like daggers, but she had an extra one on either side. Smaller but just as pointed.  
Léah contorted her face into an obscene grimace to show her lower teeth and her heart sunk when she saw the whole thing mirrored there as well.  
>>What the-, I got.. I-<< she couldn’t bring herself to say it, didn’t really know how to say it either.  
>>Fangs. You grew fangs.<< Remus stated dryly.  
>>Well, we all knew it would happen sometime, right? So…-<< Hermione said trying to sound comforting.  
>>We all knew?<< Léah repeated her words, slumping back onto the toilet seat still holding her face in disbelief.  
>>I mean obviously I had a hunch that something was…well, off, since you accidently froze a glass of water last year without using your wand or a spell and by the time you started showing the first signs of physical changes – nothing as drastic as this, now, that’s for sure – but changes nonetheless in the last few months, I figured it out, I-<< She seemed proud and guilty at the same time.  
>>Of course you did<< Léah sighed. >>Fangs. Fucking fangs…<< she whispered, more to herself.  
>>And I sort of told Ron about my suspicions and the research I did but he didn’t believe me anyways. Well, what can I say, he ought to believe me now, right?<< she laughed nervously.  
>>I am not mad that you told him, H. Actually, I’m kinda glad that I didn’t have to tell you guys myself.<< There was a shy knock on the door but without waiting for an answer a particularly impatient ginger stuck her head through the door.  
>>Are you okay? Is it over?<< Ginny asked, a worried look on her face. >>For now.<< Remus sighed and helped Léah up and back to her bed. At the sight, that greeted her in their room she couldn’t help but roll her eyes.  
Ron was sitting on Ginny’s bed, looking worried and intimidated at the same time, Sirius was standing in front of her, arms on his hips and Léah was fairly certain he had been pacing up and down the room up until this very moment. Hermione and Ginny still stood in the doorway to the bathroom and gave her concerned looks, while Remus sat down next to her, wrapping one arm around her shoulders. She really hated being cared for and worried about. And she hated that she needed it.

It took several promises to Remus that, yes, she was feeling better and, yes, she was absolutely sure and of course they were going to really talk about it the next day and she swore to not keep anything from him anymore, for him to squeeze her one last time and leave. >>You better be honest about this, otherwise I have to listen to hours of him contemplating again, couz.<< Sirius said in a low whisper but with that ever-present twinkle in his eyes.  
After Sirius closed the door behind them the room was filled with a few breaths of unsettling silence.  
>>Sooo. Hermione was right after all? You’re some sort of a, what? A Mermaid with weird teeth now?<< Ron broke the awkwardness with his usual charm, that coaxed a shy laugh from the girls – Ginny now sitting next to him on her bed and Hermione right across from Léah on her own bed.  
>>A Siren, Ronald.<< she said, raising an instructive finger. >>Right, a Siren, which is just a fancy word for mermaid, is it not?<< Ron huffed and Ginny rolled her eyes, shooting Léah an apologetic look.  
>>Except way more deadly and not quite as enchanting, I am afraid.<< Léah admitted not daring to look anyone direct in the eye.  
>>You are not a monster, Léah! Don’t even start thinking that way.<< Hermione said in earnest. Léah looked up at her with an expression that read something like Quit lying to yourself, you read the books, and You can’t know that. But she didn’t emphasize that by adding spoken words, also because she was way too tired to argue.  
>>And what is a Siren exactly then?<< Ginny asked. >>I mean you won’t have to live in a fish tank or something, will you?<< she inquired with her brother’s charm. Now it was Léah’s turn to laugh, although it was painful to, her body sore from head to toe.  
>>No, I won’t. Thankfully I am only part Siren, the other part still very much witch – best of both worlds, I guess. Although I will develop a growing affinity to nature, more precisely water, being able to perform elemental magic in that regard, which is sort of… nice.<< It was true, that bit didn’t sound too bad at all, but she wasn’t shitting anyone, because all of them knew all too well, that fangs had nothing to do with elemental magic. Then again, blood was made up of mostly water, so… Léah shook her head, to stop her thoughts from trailing down that particular sinister road.  
>>And then just think about throwing some vampire into the mix and you got yourself a Siren. Pretty deadly Mermaid, wouldn’t you say?<< she looked at Hermione sort of reproachful. Guilt clutched her heart at the sight of Hermione wincing quietly at her words, but she was too exhausted to continue this conversation, so she just fell back into the pillows, turning her back on them as she pulled the blanket up to her chin and squeezed her eyes shut.


	2. Love and Sacrifice

Léah didn’t feel herself falling asleep. She didn’t feel her mind waking up again either. Sometime in the late morning she just realized that she was conscious all of a sudden. She didn’t feel awfully tired though, so that was somewhat of a relief.

Again, the other beds were empty. This morning she took her time getting ready. Most of this time, however, she spent staring at the figure looking back at her through the mirror. Familiar but more and more alienated the longer she studied her. The long raven hair was still hers, as well as the contrast created by light skin and bright eyes under dark brows. Her features still a mixture of sharp and fine lines and frame rather slim.   
But she had started to look weak, gaunt almost, in the past weeks as she had lost weight, which made her collarbones ever so slightly more prominent and her jaw look like it would cut fingers trying to caress. Cheeks hollower than before. Pearl skin had become ivory, cold to touch and grey eyes were now silver, eyeing her as though she herself was the strange one. And maybe she was. 

When she took the last steps down on her way toward the kitchen, she wanted to turn on her heels immediately and go somewhere – anywhere – else, but- >>Léah, dear, good you are awake. We were just talking… Come in, would you?<< Molly’s smile was warm and sincere but her eyes only spoke of pity and sorrow. She motioned for her to come in and as soon as Léah was in grabbing distance she practically shoved her through the door and locked it behind her, she herself not accompanying them.   
Sitting around the table were Remus, with an apologetic look on his face – Léah thought it must have become his resting face by now – next to him none other than Albus Dumbledore and at the head of the table the brooding presence of Severus Snape darkening her peripheral vision significantly. Fuck! She thought. >>Shit!<< she said. >>Delighted to see you are feeling better. Please sit down.<< Dumbledore said politely as ever. With a tense hiss she sat down across from Remus and Dumbledore, Snape to her immediate right, locked door to her back. >>Professor Dumbledore, what a lovely surprise. Snape.<< she nodded with a hint of mockery but continued smoothly, >>To what do I owe this…questioning?<< she put on an innocent expression. >>Léah…<< Remus said with a pleading tone.

>>I can imagine that it is hard for you. To experience it, to talk about it, everything. But I am also very certain, that you do understand just how important it is, to have this discussion. For all parties involved<< Dumbledore glanced at her in urgency over the rim of his glasses. Léah instantly felt stupid for her cockiness and lack of respect. After all, he was absolutely right, and she was merely compensating, feeling estranged within her own body. It was in her best interest as well, so she would understand what would await her and what was to come. Moreover, she could become an actual threat to the people she loved, if she wasn’t absolutely careful and learned how to deal with this siren-shit. So, she just nodded in silent defeat, or rather, surrender. 

>>Very well<< Dumbledore leaned back a little and folded his hands on the table. >>Remus brought it to my attention that last school year’s incident must have triggered your transformation and as it happens last night you experienced the most intense shift as of yet, correct?<< she nodded again, her throat chocked by memory. For a moment her questioning gaze found that of Professor Snape – an expression of masterfully crafted blankness making it impossible to read anything into it. He must have told Dumbledore about his observations, about the trigger. Snape had been there that night. He had witnessed Léah breaking apart from within and had seen glimpses of her, that nobody not even herself had ever known to exist. She had been able to see it in his eyes, as his expression mirrored exactly what she had felt when parts of her died waking others from a long and deep slumber. Not even Remus or Harry would ever be able to understand nor grasp the darkness that was awakened inside her that night. To be fair she never would want them to either, they would never be able to admit to themselves what she had become– at least part of her – a monster. It would hurt them too much. 

It took her a moment to realize that all eyes were on her, waiting for an iterar to a question she didn’t catch. >>Sorry, what did you say?<<  
>>If you could be so kind, Miss Johnson, as to tell Professor Dumbledore about any other symptoms that may come to mind.<< Snapes voice – layered, deep but cold – cut through the air for the first time and made her jaw clench involuntarily.  
>>Please be thorough.<< Dumbledore added with kind eyes. She took a deep breath and gathered her thoughts. >>Sure, uhm. First, I started to lose appetite – hence the weight loss and such. I’m always cold. Sometimes I feel as though my senses are heightened. Some dull headaches recently but I guess me growing bloody fangs clears that right up.<< she didn’t really feel like keeping her sarcasm at bay this time and just shrugged her shoulders. Dumbledore hummed thoughtful and looked at Remus as if to ask him, if he could think of something Léah hadn’t mentioned.  
>>Her eyes changed colour.<< he offered. >>For now, that should be enough.<< Dumbledore said to Leah’s surprise.

>>Something else, however, Léah, you do know what this is, what it means, do you?<< Dumbledore made an expansive gesture that included the room with its high ceilings and the whole table with its taken an empty seats all the same. She knew what he meant. >>Yes, I do, Sir. The Order is preparing for war. As is Voldemort.<< she stated matter-of-factly and serious now. Remus started shifting in his seat in discomfort, furrowing his brows unsure what was about to unfold. Snape on the other hand appeared to be in on whatever Dumbledore had planned. As usual.  
>>I want you to become an inner-circle member of the Order of the Phoenix, Léah.<< his gaze piercing hers, studying for any stir of emotion however small it may be. She held eye contact waiting for a wave of something like surprise to wash over her but it failed to appear.  
>>What? Albus!<< Remus almost shouted, every reservation cracked and shattered to the ground in form of his – thankfully empty – metal cup. >>Pull yourself together, Remus!<< Snape hissed, his voice dripping in years old contempt. The headmaster and Léah were still just staring at each other bonded through silent thought.

>>It is not a request.<< Léah said after a seconds long while. >>It is not an order.<< said Dumbledore so sugar sweet it almost made Léah laugh out loud. >>You can not be serious, she is a child, just like the others, Albus.<< Remus appealed, running his hands through his dulled hair, nearly outraged.  
>>But I am nothing like the others, that’s just it, is it not?! I am something entirely different.<< Léah almost grinned, realization brightening up her face. >>You will be.<< Dumbledore said with a trace of regret shading his voice.  
>>You knew my answer would have been yes either way, didn’t you?<< she said through a smirk. >>As I said, it wasn’t an order.<< Dumbledore winked at her. >>I am in.<< he nodded in approval. >>She will be attending the meetings of the Order from now on, Remus.<< he said kind but final. >>I beg that you will come to understand, that I would never decide such things lightly and without good reason.<< he almost whispered taking Remus hand in both of his. >>I know that, Albus, of course I do. It is just-<< seeing Remus so genuinely distraught for her sake made her swallow hard and she had to bite her lower lip to stop it from quivering. >>I know, Remus and that is precisely why. Love. Always Love.<< And sacrifice.

>>Why weren’t you keeping us lovely company, Sirius? Didn’t fancy a nice evening chat with old school mates.<< Léah teased him, lightly kicking his knee from where she laid sprawled on the sofa, her head on Hermione’s thigh. >>I really am not keen on spending any precious second longer than absolutely necessary with that old hag, thank you very much. You seem awfully light-hearted for a change though.<< Sirius smacked her foot with the book he was reading, or rather merely holding. >>Seems like she sucked the optimism right out of our favourite Professor.<< Ron shot Remus a curiously scrutinizing look, who was sitting in an armchair to Hermione’s right so Léah could only imagine his brow-furrowed expression of deep thoughtfulness. >>Not my fault.<< said Léah raising her hands in a theatrical display of innocence. She was hit with something soft but firm right in the face and let out a spontaneous loud laugh when she realized that Remus had, in fact, really just hit her with his pillow. It felt like she broke something, so strange had the sensation of laughter shaking her body become but it felt awfully freeing and when she heard Sirius’ mischievous giggle fill the air and hesitant warmth vibrating from Remus behind her, she couldn’t stop laughing. Ron snorted in surprise and approval while Hermione’s light chuckles shook Leah’s head on her legs.  
The dark clouds that had been looming right above her head for weeks were so far away now, Léah could see the sky again. Clouds – dark, grey, white – coming and going in tides. Dumbledore was right, of course he was. It is always Love.


	3. A Silver Thread

The following days Léah felt better than she had in what seemed like ages. For some moments she even started to forget, that part of her was turning less and less human. It was also in those moments that she created the habit of laughing more often than not and it seemed to come easier to her. Only when she cut her tongue from time to time on her own unnatural sharp teeth when she slid the tip across like she did when she smiled, was she reminded that she was in fact not fully human anymore.  
Other than that, Léah thankfully hadn’t been in any more pain. Judging by the tingling and itching sensation that took hold of her body now and again, however, something was still most definitely changing within. 

>>The twins overheard Mom and Dad talking yesterday. Seems like tonight is going to be your first meeting as member of the order.<< said Ron before he stuffed his mouth with a handful of Berty Botts every flavour beans, the red ones only. Léah had been grateful that Ron and Hermione weren’t jealous or pressing her for details she couldn’t really give them anyway. For one, because she didn’t know much herself and second because she didn’t want to betray Dumbledore’s trust in her just yet.

>>Here, look-<< Hermione scooted closer pointing at a heavily highlighted paragraph in the book on her lap she had been reading for the past hour or so, only occasionally making noises to confirm she was in fact also still listening, although she had very much not been, as Ron had gotten away with some childish remarks about Victor Krum way to easily. >>Have you ever tried to manipulate water again? On purpose I mean? According to this, you should be able to by now, without much practice.<< Léah shook her head. >>Ronald, get us a cup of water.<< she ordered and, surprisingly, he got up and fetched a glass of water, accompanied by an extensive eyeroll and grunts of annoyance, but nevertheless he placed it before them on the couch table.  
>>Go ahead then.<< said Hermione with a way too excited look on her face as she gestured impatiently at the glass. >>I am not sure how, H. I am not even sure if I know an appropriate spell-<< >>You don’t need a spell. You have to access a different kind of magic. Siren-magic as opposed to your mundane magic. Just try.<< said Hermione wide eyed in anticipation and even Ron was staring expectantly at Léah and the glass of water. >>Alright, alright.<< Léah let out a breath in an attempt to focus and closed her eyes.  
First, she just closed her hand around the glass and searched for some sort of a connection to another source of magic within her. She didn’t feel anything. So, she then gently placed her index finger on the still water surface and suddenly something stirred in the depth of her subconscious. In an estimating manner she moved her finger across the water a few times. It felt as though the water was holding onto her, as if it somehow became part of her. A sense of certainty overcame her that, wherever she went, water would follow, so she just raised her hand and was rewarded with an uniform gasp from both Ron and Hermione. When Léah opened her eyes she almost did the same. Her finger hovered a few inches above the glass, circled by glistening ever-moving strands of water, one of them snaking its way up her finger in a spiral, like a silver thread.   
>>Wow.<< breathed a voice and when Léah looked up she saw Sirius standing in the doorway to the kitchen an impressed look on his face. She heard a light splash and felt water droplets on her hand. >>Wicked.<< said Ron more astounded than he really should be considering >>it was just a little water<< Léah tried to downplay the fact that she was also filled with a sense of pride and wonder. >>That was beautiful, Léah.<< Hermione smiled content as she folded the book closed.

It was weird. Not quite awkward but weird. Léah was sitting next to Remus, Dumbledore at the head of the table next to them and right across from her, Severus Snape. It was weird because Léah hadn’t won the impression that Dumbledore had told anybody in the Oder about his new addition apart from the four of them. Well, and Sirius, who stood against a wall leaning back into the shadows knew.  
Eyes were lingering on her in confusion but nobody brought it up either. She noticed them dancing around words and certain topics unsure how explicit they were allowed to be and Dumbledore made no effort to tell them. Léah had the feeling that maybe Dumbledore was testing her so she just listened intently. They were talking about it, the artefact being their only real trump or weapon. Probably a weapon to defeat Voldemort, to help kill him, Léah thought.   
Kingsley made his disappointment apparent when he reported about Minister Fudge still being caught in paralyzing denial and feeding the press lie after lie about last school year’s events. Lies about Harry and Dumbledore galore, lies about Sirius, lies about Voldemort and his followers. Léah clenched her now white knuckled fist around her glass in anger, jaw clicking in her head.   
The bitterness was back in an instant. After what Crouch Jr. had done to her, she had supressed every fibre within that urged her to tear him to shreds right then and there – and that had been absolutely every last part of her being at that time – as to preserve the evidence for Voldemort’s return, he represented. All that just so that this incapable shadow of a Minister of Magic could destroy it all by a Dementor’s kiss over fright and stupidity.  
She heard a faint crack as though from far away but it seemed she was the only one, as nobody else reacted. When she looked down to her hand on the table, she found the water in her glass to be frozen, a fine line on the rim of the glass being the origin of the sound.  
Quickly she loosened her grip and hid her hands under the table in a tight clasp on top of her legs. When she was looking up again, Snape was staring right back at her definitely having born witness to that secret play and as if trying to get into her head. Léah broke eye contact first, feeling unbearably vulnerable all of a sudden.  
And so it went on for another hour. It was talked about people Léah didn’t know and couldn’t remember the names of and other trivialities. So, she took the time to study the other members a little more closely. Next to Snape there were about three people’s-worth of deliberately left space. Tonks sat diagonally across Remus and Léah and seemed equally as interested as the latter. Léah did like her, objectively. Subjectively speaking, she definitely spent too much time with Remus and yes, Léah was absolutely aware that she was being childish about it. Behind her Sirius observed, steadily twirling his beard between his fingers. Kingsley to their left was the one talking at the moment but Léah didn’t pay attention to what about. Next to her and Remus sat two aurors with conservative but nice features. Mr. Weasley sat on the opposite head of the table leaning back into his chair.   
Moody could have just as well not been there at all. Much like Sirius, he just listened standing somewhere behind Léah at the sink. She was pretty sure he glanced out of the window there in suspicion at least ever other breath, although he didn’t actually have to considering his magical eye that could literally look through walls.  
>>Thank you all very much, I think that will be all for today.<< Dumbledore closed the meeting not giving the impression he was about to leave any time soon, however. >>If you could just stay for a few more moments, Léah.<< he said quietly toward her and she slumped back on her seat. A couple professionally distant nods and handshakes later only Dumbledore, Snape, Remus, Sirius – who was now sitting where Tonks had been before – and Léah were left scattered around the long table.  
>>Quite the trick,<< Dumbledore said amused pointing at the glass in front of Léah. The ice was now reduced to a thin layer grazing the surface and little icy stars decorating the sides. Of course he had noticed.   
>>Did any other new or unusual abilities surface as part of your…transformation?<< Snape asked unexpectedly, somewhat interested even. >>Abilities?<< Léah whispered more to herself, still watching the last icy scales melt away. For some reason she was startled and her mind began turning that word over, inside out, weighing it carefully. 

>>Oh my god.<< she said half amused by her own ineptitude before looking back up right into Snapes face. >>God, it all makes a lot more sense now! How did I not realize that before.<< she now turned to Dumbledore whose knowing but sad smile confirmed what slowly but surely dawned on her.  
>>All that talk about it, the artefact. I assumed that you were talking about a weapon – the killing kind. But that’s not it, is it? Not that there isn’t such a weapon, because war requires those of the killing kind, no matter which side you’re on, oh no, there definitely is one. It’s just not what you were referring to…<< Dumbledore looked pained now, the others weren’t even looking at all, Remus had turned wooden next to her. >>…Then again, I guess, there frankly wouldn’t be any apparent need to talk about a people-killing kind of weapon anyway. Not when it has been sitting right at this very table the whole time, would there now, Professor?<< she hissed – low but clear – coldness in her voice making herself shiver. >>Don’t talk like this, Léah.<< Remus nothing but breathed through clenched teeth and she wasn’t sure if he meant her blatant disrespect toward Dumbledore or the fact that she had referred to herself as a weapon. >>Why not, is it not the truth? Enlighten me then.<< Léah asked an eyebrow cocked in provocation, chin higher than usual, back painfully straight. >>Watch your tongue, Miss Johnson.<< Snape spat, he most definitely only referring to her cockiness. His face, however, did show traces of tense amusement.

>>I hope I have never given any reason for you to misjudge me in such a way!<< Dumbledore said stern. He wasn’t shouting, but he might as well have been. Léah felt her composure crumble but wasn’t quite ready to back down just yet, so she just held her breath and continued to stare him down. >>I would never overlook the person in favour of the advantages they may bring to the table. I would never reduce a person – not to mention someone I hold dear – to something as primitive as a weapon, a tool to achieve a certain outcome with! Not even, or especially not in times of approaching war.<< his calm but authoritative voice echoed uncomfortably in Leah’s head and now she wished for him to just yell at her.   
Then, he practically sunk back into himself, sighing in defeat. >>And still, I simply can not say that what you said has no truth to it, my dear, for it would be a lie.<< that confession took the wind out of her sails for good and she buried her face in her hands for a heavy breath out and in. >>I am sorry. I didn’t know what came over… well, I do know, but – I… sorry, Professor.<< she said, her words muffled through her fingers before she glanced at him again in apology. >>You have nothing to be sorry for. I am no saint. In fact, I welcome the prudent honesty, reminds me of certain kin of yours.<< Dumbledore said and nodded his head toward Sirius who clicked his tongue in response, grinning. Snape scoffed. Remus let out a nervously relieved huff as he tried to shake off the remaining tension in his shoulders.

>>She is getting better at elemental magic.<< Said Sirius to pull the conversation back on track. >>Lovely, Black. Would you care to entertain any more revelations of the blatantly obvious?<< Snape rolled his eyes gesturing at the cup on the table between him and Léah. Léah could tell how Sirius forcibly ignored Snape in order to not sacrifice the new common ground that was build for all of them and elaborated, >>Not just changing physical state – she could do that before, even by accident – she was able to bind its properties to her being… her other core of magic and manipulate it’s very essence.<< she didn’t know, Sirius could be so poetic and now he sounded like he had just been struck by inspiration. >>I just made water…sort of… float, not really much different that making it freeze I reckon.<< Léah shrugged her shoulders but this time she was the one being ignored as Dumbledore studied the glass in thoughtfulness and it seemed as though Sirius’ words had bared more meaning than just being easy on the ears, at least for the others. >>Fascinating.<< he paused, >>Anything else?<< heads were shaken.

>>What do you think will it take for the people to believe? For Fudge to get a grip, Professor?<< asked Léah out of the blue, melancholy painting her voice grey. >>Too much, I am afraid, my dear. Every death that follows, every corruption that emerges is one too many already. It is why our work is so important, why it is necessary. This war will claim its sacrifice, if Fudge wants to see it or not, that is the bitter truth.<< Léah nodded. Bitter but also comforting.   
With a sigh Dumbledore stood up, thereby declaring this meeting completed and started to make his way toward the door. When Léah heard Molly talking politely and the front door being opened she hurried after them. A remnant of guilt was still nagging at her conscience. 

>>It was never my intention to offend you, Sir…<< said Léah leaning through the doorway. Dumbledore took her hands in his, >>Mine neither. But-<< >>We are at war. I do understand. I do also understand now, that it was the only right thing to do: to make me part of this Order and use the assets given to me by fate for the common good. For Harry.<< said Léah, solemnity carrying her words. Remus, who was standing behind her, placed a hand on her back, squeezing once. Love and Sacrifice.


	4. Lantern Lights on Glistening Ground

After that a routine was formed. Léah attended the meetings regularly, gaining more and more insight after which she granted their inner circle of confidants this very thing regarding her transformation and any new abilities.  
She got better at her elemental magic, being able to make water change physical state at will, no touch necessary and managing to bind larger amounts of water for longer periods of time. She didn’t mention that itching sensation in her throat she started to feel more often, however.   
At some point Hermione had the idea to try doing normal magic – as she called it – but without Leah’s wand by tapping into her siren magic and redirecting it. It didn’t quite work out as she imagined, but Léah did let a feather hover for some seconds, which seemed to count as success in Hermione’s books nonetheless.

//

>>We are going to get Harry tonight.<< Léah said. Ron almost chocked on his Toast. >>Thought I’d warn you and I don’t think Dumbledore would mind me telling you in advance.<< she shrugged awkwardly, turning her food around on her plate. >>I imagine he’ll be… tense.<< Hermione said carefully, straightening her blouse. >>Tense? He’s going to be bloody pissed is what he will be.<< said Ron chewing down another huge bite of food. >>Why now?<< asked Hermione. >>Apparently, he performed a spell in front of a muggle. They threw him out of Hogwarts for it.<< Léah told them what she knew from Dumbledore and McGonagall. >>They did what?!<< Hermione shrieked. 

//

Arriving at Privet Drive no 4 unlocked some deeply buried memories of Léah’s time living with muggles. It was surreal seeing this forced accuracy repeat from house to house. Grass and hedges meticulously cut, cars neatly parked, lights dimmed or turned off at this late hour. A mundane grasp for control in a world full of secret chaos. 

Léah didn’t let herself dwell on her past however, a sense of purpose allowing her to stand more upright than usual. Contrary to her fears, she didn’t feel like dead weight on this mission, as the rest of her party treated her like a colleague as opposed to an inexperienced kid. Moody had taken somewhat of a liking to her and she often thought that maybe it was because he could see a version of himself in her. Broken to the point it tore one apart not only from the inside and stitched back together to form something strangely familiar but different.

Joyful anticipation to see Harry ultimately outweighing traces of worry, she went ahead first. Only when she stood face to face with Harry did she really realize how much she’d missed him and confronted with his wide-eyed-mouth-gaping expression she threw herself into his arms squeezing him tight. Just when he recovered from his initial surprise and closed his arms around her back, her name leaving his lips in a whisper, Léah was pulled back at her shoulder. >>If you aren’t keen on turning this very heart-warming display into a family affair, you should reserve this kind of behaviour for later. Now, let’s move!<< Moody hissed, his eye looking through the ceiling in suspicion.  
Léah felt that itch in the very back of her throat again, her mind clouded in a haze of overstimulation all of a sudden. She looked back at Harry – dryness strangling her throat – when she realized he was occupying her senses in an almost intruding manner.   
The time stood still as she took him in. She could still smell the skin of his neck where she had buried her nose just moments ago, still feel his body heat radiating from her own fingers. She swore that steady beat filling her ears – making the whispered instructions from Moody to Harry fade far away into the background – could only be his heart beat. Her sight was fixed on a very particular spot on his neck, the colour blue unnaturally prominent in her eyes, a deliciously intriguing line she never noticed before. Shit.

Harry’s few belongings were quickly packed and transported to Grimmauld Place.  
They were flying fast – Tonks and Harry had a light hearted race – and the cold night air was like a cold shower for Léah’s senses. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Why does it have to be now? She scolded herself inwardly for wrongly imagining that some otherworldly grace might spare her of the downsides of turning. More specifically, the thirst. Bloodthirst.   
The thought made her mouth water involuntarily in some twisted way. She wanted to vomit, disgusted at herself. 

When they arrived, she hoped nobody could tell how on edge she was.  
>>Harry!<< Molly exclaimed with open arms, shielding his sight but letting Léah slip past to join the rest of the Order. She felt Harry’s sceptical look drilling into her back. >>See you in a minute, alright?<< she shot him an apologetic smile over her shoulder and immediately discarded said smile when the door was shut walking dead-on to the tall cabinet right across the room. That deadly itch in her throat nearly made her cough.   
She reached to the top shelf and found what she hoped for. A dusty bottle of Fire Whiskey. >>Léah! What exactly is it, that you think you’ll be doing with that?<< Remus’ scandalized reach for authority was happily ignored as she uncorked the bottle with her bare hands before taking a huge gulp of the fiery liquid. She sighed in relief when it absolutely had the desired effect. That itch was drowned with another swallow and that alien desire burned away all the way down to her stomach with a third. For now, at least, she was better.  
Léah didn’t even have to reach for one of the glasses next to the dustless circle the bottle had left behind. The thought was formed in her mind and the glass closest to the edge started levitating and floated into her hand. The bottle back where it belonged and the glass filled to the brim with smoking wetness made her feel less like savage but Remus most definitely did not agree with that sentiment. Lulled in artificial confidence that she owed to the Fire Whiskey, she sat down next to Remus like she always did. He however, did not even try to cloak the anger in his eyes in the slightest.  
>>What? I had a sore throat.<< said Léah serenely shrugging her shoulders. >>Léah. Katelyn. John-<< she cut him off with an eyeroll that would make Hermione blush, >>Oh don’t even start, Remus. I am old enough-<< >>Put an end to this trivial nonsense right this second! I beg you, spare us all of this childish quarrelling.<< It was Snape that saved her from saying some things she would otherwise very well have regretted. Léah took one last gulp before Remus practically tore the glass out of her hand, downed the last two thirds in one go and placing it back in front of his foster daughter with a demonstrative thud.   
The last Order-members found their places - thankfully not really having paid attention, all preoccupied by their own little discussions – and Dumbledore, sitting on the other far away end of the table, declared this evening’s meeting as official with a clearing of the throat.  
The whole time Léah felt the studious gaze of Severus Snape weighing on her. Quite to the contrary, Remus granted her no attention at all, looking everywhere but in her direction. Léah wasn’t sure if she had ever actually seen him this mad before. Not with her at least. She didn’t really feel too bad though, as trying to quench bloodthirst by any other measure than actually drinking blood seemed to be a pretty good excuse.  
Léah was grateful that she didn’t have to undergo another questioning after the meeting ended. Dumbledore and Snape left somewhat in a hurry. 

Tonks, Kingsley and Moody agreed to stay for dinner and Molly was quick to call the rest of the household to the kitchen. Léah felt the confidence buzz wear off and started to feel awkward next to Remus, so she helped Molly and Ginny set the table.  
Harry was heart-warmingly embraced by Sirius and Remus seemed to have forgotten that he was angry for the moment, which made Léah sigh to herself in relief.  
When they all sat down again, she offered Remus a hesitant smile as a peace offering. He didn’t smile back but he did nod ever so slightly and held her gaze for a moment.  
>>A plus parenting earlier, Remus. Necking that whole thing like it was nothing, impressive. Didn’t think you still had it in you.<< said Sirius being the fucking tease that he is. >>Oh god…<< Léah whimpered burying her face in her hands. Just when she thought she had escaped the sinking ship, Sirius had to go blow up the whole damn harbour. >>Very funny.<< Remus uttered at his best friend and when he didn’t take any action as to resume their unresolved fight right in front of everyone Léah dared to look back up. >>You guys good?<< asked Ron through his munching. >>Fine!<< they said in unison. Sirius huffed complacently, Harry in confusion and Ron in defence.

>>Harry, about your hearing,<< Mr. Weasley intervened from where he was sitting to Remus’ right, >>it seems it’ll be in front of the whole ministry-<<   
>>Why, what does the Ministry of Magic have against me?<< asked Harry blank-faced.   
At Moody’s request Kingsley passed Harry the latest issue of the Daily Prophet with his face decorating the front page under another offensive headline. >>They are writing shit about Dumbledore as well.<< said Ron in a rather poor attempt to sound comforting. >>Fudge is convinced Dumbledore is out for his position.<< Remus added. >>Why would anyone in their right mind-<< Harry started. >>That is exactly the point. Fudge isn’t in his right mind. It has been twisted and warped by fear.<< said Remus. >>He wouldn’t see the truth if it kicked him right in the face. He doesn’t want to see the truth.<< Léah said, bitterness painting a grimace on her face.  
>>Which is…<< Harry tried, directed at nobody in particular, except that Léah was fairly certain he was addressing the order, a tint of reproach in his voice.  
>>We think,<< Sirius sat up straighter in his chair, >>Voldemort is creating an army, recruiting again, like he had once before.<< a tenseness spread across the table that was visible in freezing of movement and pulling up of shoulders. Moody cleared his throat carefully behind Sirius. He continued regardless, >>He didn’t just recruit witches and wizards back then. All sorts of dark creatures followed his call. So we are trying to do the same; to prepare.<< Harry listened intently, waiting for more. >>We also think, he is trying to get a hold of something.<< Moody grunted in warning, >>Sirius.<< Sirius leaned closer toward Harry. >>Something, he didn’t have last time…<< The artefact, thought Léah.   
>>Some sort of a weapon, or-<< Harry inquired but was interrupted by someone breaking out of their petrification. >>Enough! He is still just a boy. You might as well initiate him into the Order if you continue like this!<< Molly yelled.   
>>Great, I want to join! If Voldemort is raising an army then I want to fight.<< Harry exclaimed. >>It is not your burden to bear; you are all still kids.<< Arthur agreed with his wife and Léah wanted to sink into the ground.   
But Harry didn’t say anything in return, instead he started eating, apparently deep in thought. 

The others resumed eating their food as well and more relaxed conversation emerged across the table again. Ginny, Hermione and Tonks were having a laugh at the other end of the room, the twins and Ron were quarrelling and teasing each other, while Kingsley and Arthur were talking about something trivial but work-related. Sirius, Harry Remus and Léah weren’t talking though, just silently eating, which left Moody, still leaning against the counter behind Sirius taking a sip out of his flask every now and again.  
>>How come, you are in the order then, Léah.<< asked Harry trying his best to sound conversational. >>Dumbledore wanted me to…<< she shrugged. >>Because of what’s happening to you?<< he said bluntly. His brief glance over to Hermione told her, that she must’ve filled him in to some extent.  
>>Harry, you don’t understand-<< she tried, but he interrupted her with a challenging look in his eyes. >>No, I don’t. Actually, I really don’t think that this,<< he vaguely gestured at her, >>should make you a better addition to the order than me. After all, I can’t recall you having to face Voldemort even once, whereas I had to prove myself three times already. So why you?<< he sounded almost petty and Léah could sense an unfamiliar anger boiling right underneath the surface within him. It caught her off guard.  
>>How very modest of you Harry. Ever the charmer.<< sarcasm was the only defence she could muster as of now.  
>>Not an answer.<< he said dryly.  
>>Harry, you are being unfair.<< Sirius urged his godson to reason.  
>>You could also call getting superpowers overnight unfair.<< he shrugged with atypical indifference and now definitely overstepping a line. Léah heard someone gasp, apparently, they had begun raising their voices. Léah snapped.  
>>You have absolutely no bloody idea what the fuck you are talking about, Harry! You think you have seen horrors? Being faced with death so many times? Well, try being tortured into insanity by a psychotic murderer! Try wishing for that same death’s gracious release with every fibre of your being and being forced to hold onto life still, because otherwise said psycho would do the same thing to your best friend! You were right there, Harry,<< she could feel hot tears running down her neck, >>This shit changes you, and it made me into something else, painfully so! These aren’t superpowers, Harry, look at me, << she ignored the pain and regret in his face as she bared her sharp teeth with a predatory hiss, >>You don’t win wars with superpowers, you win them with warriors. And warriors need blades. I am the deadliest blade, Harry.<< she had stopped yelling, her voice heavy with bitterness again, >>And Dumbledore is trying to make sure that I end up on the right side of this, because I may become someone totally different. He is trying to do so by keeping me closest. Not because I am the biggest asset, but because I might otherwise be the greatest threat to his greatest asset. You.<< she ended feeling exhausted. Her skin was tight were the silent tears had left dry lines.  
The silence was suffocating.  
>>I-… sorry.<< Harrys voice cracked through thick air, broken. >>I don’t know wh-… I didn’t mean to…<< he seemed genuinely distraught. >>I know… You’re lucky I can relate to saying shit you don’t mean, right now. Sort of a side effect of, you know…<< she leaned back crossing her arms, still tense.   
>>So, what are you turning into then, Harry? A vicious human-sized mole?<< Ron held his breath knowing all too well that this joke was probably among the most reckless things he’d done in… ever. But it worked and Léah relaxed a bit, smiling faintly. The rest seemed to count that as permission to burst into laughter, cautiously at first but in earnest when Harry gave a shy smile himself.  
Léah didn’t miss the worried looks Remus gave her from the side, however. And if one looked carefully, they would realize that both – Harry’s and Léah’s smile alike – did not reach their eyes. 

>>You coming?<< asked Ginny looking back at Léah from where she stood on the stairs on her way to their shared bedroom. Léah hesitated. >>I think I am just going to get some air.<< Ginny hummed in understanding. 

It was drizzling. Léah welcomed the cooling wet, turning her face to the clouded sky. She made her way toward the little park right across the street as she heard a door open and close behind her. Footsteps on wet pavement speaking of someone running after her. >>Léah. Wait a second.<< it was Remus. She slowed down until he caught up to her, leaning into him as they strolled through the gates toward a metal bench in soothing silence. She looked down, watching the dancing reflections of the lantern lights on glistening ground.   
When they sat down Remus draped his cloak around the both of them, wrapping his arm around her shoulders, holding her.  
>>What you said back there. Did you mean it? All of it?<< he asked. Léah remained quiet in confirmation.   
>>You wanted to die?<< a treacherous evasion of his gaze making him squeeze her shoulder tighter.   
>>I know the feeling.<< he sighed, to her surprise and when she looked at him – really looked at him – she saw that he truly did understand.   
All of a sudden, she felt stupid for not confiding in him sooner. After all, if there was anyone who was actually familiar with fighting the monster within, it was most definitely Remus. Her heart sunk at the thought that he, too, had felt such pain that had made him wish life away.

>>You were wrong about one thing, though.<< he said and she looked back at him expectantly. >>You are no one’s blade, Léah. You are your own warrior. And your abilities are your own as well – blade or shield, it doesn’t matter. No matter how you might feel right now, just know that you will never be wielded, as you only ever wield yourself.<< she thought about that for a little while.  
>>That is what I – what we all – can only hope for. But I also would rather Dumbledore mould me into a weapon that is to be wielded by the right people, than me being corrupted by darkness and wielding myself against the one’s I once loved.<< she said, clarity brightening her mind. Remus nodded, he seemed to be getting where she was coming from.  
>>You will never be corrupted. Stained, maybe, that is what makes you human and you should always hold on to your humanity. Even and especially on to those mundane flaws. But you will never be corrupted.<< he said with such certainty that it made the warm feeling of hope let her smile now reach her eyes.  
She stared at her hands in her lap. The moonlight shimmering on the faint shade of water making them look like porcelain. >>It’s starting, Remus. Today it was the worst it had been since the fangs. The bloodthirst, I can feel it now.<< she confessed. He didn’t really seem surprised. >>Fire Whiskey helps with that I fathom.<< he stated almost amused. >>Apparently. Yeah.<< she shrugged under his cloak.   
>>I’m grateful you told me. We will figure this out. Becoming a full-fledged alcoholic hopefully isn’t somewhere on your list of aspired achievements in life, is it now?<<   
>>Look at you, cracking jokes in the face of absolute and utter despair.<< she elbowed him.  
>>Look at you, making every life-affirming poet on this earth go pale in jealousy.<< he chimed in.


	5. A Symphony of Scent

Léah’s condition worsened over the course of just the following week. She began not only looking significantly weaker, seemingly by the hour, but physically felt that way as well. When she ate, she couldn’t keep it down for long so most of the time she chose not to eat at all.   
Her body was in a constant state of ache. Although physical affection did help with that, it got harder for her to be close to someone for too long. It was easiest with Remus, however. Hermione said it had to do with his werewolf-blood. Apparently, it was toxic to Sirens. That explained why his smell didn’t awaken the desire to sink her teeth into his neck within her. It also seemed to explain why she could barely be around him when the full moon started to approach. His smell then triggered a gut quenching primitive aversion she couldn’t handle. So, he had to be somewhere else during this time, wolfbane potion or not. Today was such a day.   
It was also the day before Harry’s hearing and the last order meeting before school started again. 

This time, Dumbledore and Snape stayed after the meeting. Molly was advised to lock the door behind her and Léah sensed nothing good coming her way.   
>>You look, like you’re dying.<< Snape said. >>How very nice of you.<< Léah shot back, squinting her eyes.   
Dumbledore didn’t say anything, he just rose from his seat and nodded to Snape as he slowly took a stance next to the locked door. He sort of made the impression as if preparing to observe a trained animal at a circus show. Léah did very much not like the look of this.   
>>Go ahead.<< he merely whispered at Snapes back, who thereupon got up and walked around the table until he stood right in front of Léah.   
>>What is this?<< she asked, confusion and tenseness apparent on her face.  
In one swift motion Snape raised his left hand – palm facing Léah – and reached into his robe with the other. Léah saw metal flash, and then Snape cut into the palm of his hand. She felt her eyes go wide at the sight of blood emerging from that cut in slow motion.   
>>No!<< she heard her own voice filled with terror. But it was only an echo and when it reached her, something else had already taken control of her.   
With strength she didn’t know she had, her body shot up, teeth bared in a deadly hiss. Driven by instinct, she grabbed Snape by the neck with such force it shoved them both against the wall behind him. Her other hand seized his bleeding one, her grip stone around his wrist.   
He let his hand be brought down, close to her face. A growl deep in her chest. The sight of blood, the smell was hypnotizing. Her eyes followed as drop after drop fell from his hand to the ground. Her tongue slid across the upper row of her teeth. She wanted it so bad, it physically hurt. She needed it. Snape made a chocked noise and tore her out of her trance. She looked at him in reflex, not loosening either one of her clutches. >>Take…..control<< he choked out looking deep into her eyes, maybe even past them. She could feel his pulse under her fingers. Léah tried to gain control over her body again. Her breath quickened. She looked back at the bloody palm. In what felt like curiosity, she extended her thumb and drove it across the cut. She let go of his wrist and smeared the blood between two fingers bringing them close to her nose. She inhaled. Her eyes fluttered shut and another deep growl left her chest, her hands tightening around his throat even more. >>Take. B-back control…. Like you did that night when you didn’t kill him….<< Snapes whisper reached her ear. Images flooded her memory. They weren’t hers, at least not quite.

She saw herself, contorted in perverted silhouettes of pain. She saw Crouch Jr., heard him laugh. She saw his face when he noticed the intruder, witnessing his crime.   
She saw herself outside, on hands and knees, crying, spitting blood, shaking. She saw her back tense as the thought was formed in her head. Kill him. Kill him!  
Then she heard herself scream, fighting this very thought, this revenge driven desire. The girl on the ground screamed and screamed and punched the ground until her knuckles were bloody and raw. Then she saw that girl slumping into herself in defeat.  
No, in victory.

Léah forced the wave of images to break with a hoarse scream, her eyes squeezed shut. When she opened them again she was breathing heavy. She looked at her hand on Snapes neck and pulled it away as if she burned herself. Tumbling backwards she tried to gain as much space between them as possible. In hectic desperation she tried to wipe the blood on her hands off onto her jeans. She looked at the men in utter shock and disbelief, even fear.   
>>Seems like your abilities finally claimed their price, now.<< Snape said with a rasp voice, rubbing his neck and closing his cut hand into a fist.  
>>Why THE FUCK would you do this?<< she shrieked hysterically. >>And you! You just stood there I, I-<< she ran her hands trough her hair over and over in fury, panting. >>I needed to test your ability to control your urges. To see weather or not it would be safe to-<< Dumbledore started, hands raised to look appeasing.  
>>SAFE?! I COULD HAVE KILLED HIM!<<   
>>But you didn’t<< Snape stated.  
>>I almost chocked you to death! I wanted to tear your throat open with my bare teeth!<< she turned back to Dumbledore, >>How could you ask this of him? Put himself into such danger?<<  
>>I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions.<< Snape sneered.  
>>Was it? Your own decision? I doubt it. Next time you want to see if a starved lion bites, you should at least have the decency to dangle the lamb in front of him yourself, Dumbledore!<< Léah spat.  
>>I would have, but I would not have been able to show you, what Severus could. Because I did never see what he did that night. I would not have been able to bring you back and that is what I would consider dangerous, don’t you agree?<< he said, calm and reserved as though they were talking about the weather. >>Believe me when I say, it had to be Severus.<< she opened her mouth to disagree but he cut her off with the raise of a hand. >>As I am not willing to discuss weather this measure was necessary, at length and I fear we wouldn’t come to an agreement today, I think it best I leave now.<<  
>>It would be best, yes.<< Léah clenched her jaw.   
>>Severus, if you would settle the rest.<< Dumbledore said, already unlocking the door. >>Of course, Headmaster.<< he said not really appearing fond of the idea of being alone with Léah right now. Mutual feeling.

>>Here.<< he reached inside his Robes again and held out a slim vial to her. >>What is it?<< she asked not daring to step closer than arm’s length.  
>>Can’t you tell?<< she looked closer. The thick liquid looked almost black but it was actually of a deep red. >>You can’t be serious.<< she looked at him incredulously.   
>>It is not human. Deer, if you must know.<< Snape told her. Léah had one arm still wrapped around herself as she reached out and took the vial. She inquired it, disgusted and intrigued all the same, turning it against the light.   
>>What? You are not vegetarian, are you?<< he teased irritatingly. >>Ha ha.<< she rolled her eyes.   
>>The key to staying in control is not to starve the lion in the first place. You need to consume blood somewhat regularly, especially in the first stages of the transformation.<< he explained.  
>>And if I don’t?<<   
>>You will most probably kill or you die. It is why you got worse. The fact that you did not kill me, did not have a single drop of my blood, being this starved is … impressive.<<   
>>Well, bottoms up then.<< she toasted to him, opened the vial and downed the blood at once. It tasted like dirt. Not bad but not good either. But it was soothing. Like honey it slid down her throat, pooling warm in her stomach. An ecstatic sigh escaped her lips as she felt the ache in her body fade away. >>Wow.<< she whispered.  
>>Until the schoolyear starts you should have one of these daily, that should get you back to strength,<< he handed her five more vials, >>during the year you will come to me once a week and then we will see how long you can go without it.<< she nodded and placed the vials on the table next to them for now.

>>Did you put these memories in my head?<< she asked looking at her feet before glancing back up at him.   
>>I merely let you see into my mind for a moment.<< Snape said, looking guarded.  
>>Hmm.<< she hummed. >>If I hadn’t decided not to, you know…Would you have stopped me?<< she wanted to know.  
>>Yes.<< he said firmly. >>Because revenge is never the way? How noble…<< she cocked an eyebrow in mockery.  
>>No, because death would have been too merciful of a penalty for what he did.<< he said to her surprise. Her eyes fell to his neck, to the bruises her hands had left there. >>Sorry about that.<< she nodded her head at his injury.   
>>I knew what I was getting into.<< he said, finality in his tone. >>That will be all. I will see you at Hogwarts, Miss Johnson, and I strongly advise you to leave that new found attitude of yours under this very roof.<< Snape said and she couldn’t tell whether in warning or joke.   
>>I will keep that in mind, Severus.<< she laughed and he just rolled his eyes in response, too fed-up to put her into place. He left and Léah took the vials to put them in her room.

She didn’t even knock but just barged into the boy‘s room. Ron and Harry were playing Wizard Chess, Hermione sat on an armchair in the corner, reading. Without a word she just walked up to Harry and pulled him into a longing hug. The sound of leather binding on wood and she felt someone close their arms around the both of them from behind. Bushy hair tickled the nape of her neck.   
>>Don’t even think that I-<< Ron started. >>Oh, come on Ron!<< Hermione said and pulled him out of his seat by the arm. With feigned reluctancy he joined their group hug and they kept holding each other like this for many deep breaths. Léah was grateful that she now could breathe them all in and just feel content and satiated.

Harry’s smell was that of golden cinnamon, spice layered with smoothness. Ron reminded her of the forest sometimes, after heavy rain maybe, a mixture of mature musk and sweetness like smoked honey. Hermione was light and dense at the same time and Léah often thought of creamy chamomile or warm spring breezes.  
When she really concentrated, she could even find traces of Remus, he had left with her as they embraced each other in farewell this morning. Remus was salted caramel, lightly burned hot chocolate, Remus was antique poetry books, he was hopeful melancholy.

Now mingled in their midst, this symphony of scent made her feel at home. The only thing she could think of to have made this even more perfect was, maybe, Lavender.


	6. Pale Midnight Tendrils

>>He just left,<< Harry contemplated, lying on Léah’s bed and staring at the ceiling, >>After the hearing, I mean. He practically ignored me… did I do something wrong?<< Hermione stopped packing for a moment. >>I am sure you didn’t. Dumbledore will have his reasons. Maybe he is just very busy at the moment.<< she shrugged.  
>>Hmm… what do you think, Léah? Has he said anything to you?<< the addressed was just throwing some books into her trunk and harvested some reproachful looks from Hermione. Léah still was somewhat on the outs with Dumbledore. Although Hermione had meant that she maybe shouldn’t have screamed at their Headmaster, Léah still thought they could all agree that this wasn’t the typical teacher-student-situation and – weather with good reason or not – he had crossed a line which did more than justify her outbreak.   
On the other hand, Léah planned to give into the role she had to play in order to protect Harry at all cost as Dumbledore had more than once implied that it all came back to him. Voldemort’s return, his apparent pursuit of this ominous artefact and the outcome of this simmering war.   
And that meant to get and keep full control of herself and that other part within.  
>>You didn’t do anything wrong, Harry. Dumbledore always has his reasons… I guess, we just have to accept that for now.<< she assured him. She could see that this didn’t satisfy him, but he let it go and sat up to start packing himself.

//

With a delicate finger she drew ornate lines on the reflecting glass, not quite touching the surface. She whispered a breath and the subtle veil the steam of her shower had cast, lifted itself from the mirror. There she stood; wet hair so black that it shimmered in a dark shade of blue. With her skin covered in glistening pearls of water she always felt the girl she was and the siren she would eventually be become one.   
Argent eyes weren’t staring back in contempt anymore and ivory skin was once again filled by more than just bones.   
Léah reached into the cabinet next to her and took out the last elegant vial. Gently and almost ritualistic she removed the glass cork to take a deep breath in. When she looked back at her reflection she could see, what her human mask would mostly hide.  
The bright silver now even filled the white in her eyes but it faded into a glowing and icy blue, pupils barely visible anymore.   
Her own veins creeped up her jaw and cheeks to her temples like pale midnight tendrils right beneath her skin. She relished in the sensation of viscous liquid soothing its way through her body, smooth on her tongue, warm in her chest. Instead of just dirt Léah would now describe the deer blood more like a blend of musk and moss , juicy but tart.

A knock tore her out of this daydream-like state. >>Léah, you ready? Did you grow fins or something? I really gotta get in there.<< said Ginny’s voice muffled through the door.


	7. of Pawns and Common Ground

Rustic air and dust painted sunrays soothed her face, the cosy rattle of the train cradled her body into a drowsy trance as the early autumn landscape rushed past her unfocused gaze. Sometimes she concentrated on copper treetops and dark green needle trees reflecting in still lakes and it felt as though she could slow down time at will. Harry mirrored Léah’s thoughtful posture but she didn’t think his view matched hers at all, as his gaze didn’t go past the glass window, a searching expression on his face. An expression that reminded her of the reflection that had stared back at her only a few weeks ago. He didn’t speak the whole ride to Hogwarts and after a couple hesitant attempts to start a conversation even Hermione gave up granting him one last sympathetic look.  
The time speeding up before her inner eye again the blur of sky, fields and woods lulled her into a shallow sleep. Lights flickered through her faintly closed lids and soon took the shape of warped memories and fears.

Snapes face between her hands. Her trembling fingers around his throat. His face becoming hazy through tears. His features warping unnaturally and when the tears were blinked away hysterically Barty Crouch Jr. gloated back at her. >>Most sincere greetings from your sister, Love<< his thin but stinging voice made her ears bleed. She saw her own hands tighten around his throat now and found her contorted face reflected in his empty eyes, nails digging deep into his flesh, drawing blood, ripping him apart. Bloody Palms, fingers spread, blood dripping. When she looked back at him it was Snape again. Dead. By her own hands. 

She awoke from her own chocked gasp, sitting upright, gripping the rim of the bench tight. A few moments later the train came to a gentle halt. It felt good setting eyes on Hogwarts again. The imposing silhouette had always emerged as a beacon of hope and fortitude against the starry sky. But now shreds of grey clouds waft around the spiers, cloaking them in mystery. An omen of changing times and malevolent eyes.  
But she had expected that neither she nor Harry would have been able to let their guard down entering Hogwarts this time. Not after last year’s events.   
So, she didn’t tell Harry, that she could see the Thestrals too, it would have lulled him into a false sense of relief and make him stumble into grief again all the same. In return, he did not give his friends any reason not to be suspicious about Umbridge’s ominous arrival at the school. It would have lulled them into a false sense of oh so familiar security at Hogwarts.

It only took one day for Harry to get into detention with Umbridge and one week for said witch to get appointed High Inquisitor And so, it did unfold. 

//

It was their third potions class and Léah’s first appointment with Snape. She did pack her things together and stood up but only to wave her friends goodbye awkwardly and stroll toward his desk at the end of the room. He looked up over her shoulder and with a flick of his wand the door slammed shut, locks clicking.  
Then he studied her for a moment, brows slightly furrowed. >>I see, the deer did you somewhat good, then.<<   
>>Alcohol always helps as well<< she laughed and coughed in superficial embarrassment as he didn’t. >>That was a joke<< she murmured more to herself, shifting her weight.  
>>But not a lie. So, what is it going to be today? A bottle of muggle whiskey on the go?<< her eyes shot back up at him, forehead creased in bewilderment and she grunted when she realized that Severus Snape had in fact just made a joke.  
>>Well, at least we can agree that muggles do that one better.<< she said with a pinch of smugness and was rewarded by amusement flickering behind his eyes for a split second.

>>How do you feel? Any unsettling symptoms?<< Snape asked, medical interest making his voice precise as he strode toward an unpretentious wooden rack on the shelf to his right. He turned the similar but ever so slightly different shaped glass vials as to read the labels and quickly found what he was looking for.  
>>Apart from the urge to sink my teeth into Umbridge’s neck occasionally, I have been feeling pretty great. I also don’t think the former has anything to do with me, I guess it’s actually a generally shared sentiment.<< Léah gushed out a little too honest and bit her tongue. But Snape didn’t even twitch as he stepped back into her personal space holding a vial of liquid red.  
>>I suggest, you refrain from following Potter on his path to weekly detention possibly for the entire school year, Miss Johnson, and give Professor Umbridge no further reason to get suspicious about you.<< he said plainly, raising one brow.  
She took the vial and covered it with both hands at waist height, clutching it somewhat tense. Earnestness furrowed her brows, >>Do you think the ministry knows? About me, I mean…<<   
>>I can’t say for certain. One can only speculate that your familial ties – even if attempts have been made to cover them up – would give enough reason to keep an eye on you, especially now.<< he said and she knew he was referring to her kinship with the Blacks, specifically Sirius still being considered a fugitive Death Eater.  
>>I wouldn’t consider them family…<< Léah muttered.  
>>Then, I would think that being practically adopted by a wild animal doesn’t paint a particularly proper picture either.<< now he was talking about Remus having been a thorn in the ministry’s eyes for a while and she rolled her eyes.  
He nodded at the vial in her hands, probably as to remind her why they were here in the first place, but not impatient.   
>>Do you mind…?<< she inquired, circling one finger rather timid as to ask him to turn away. The consumption of blood had become something of an intimate indulgence and she felt oddly vulnerable at the thought of Snape watching her this time.  
He turned around with a uncharacteristic understanding nod.

It wasn’t deer. She noticed that right away. The flavour was flat and the aftertaste bland. It made her tongue dry and lead. Léah clicked her tongue and let out a shuddering sound, her body shaken by the blood making its way down her spine as if searching for a way out.

>>So, no rabbit next time, noted.<< Snape said as he turned back around, reading the signs correctly. He accepted the now empty vial and put it on the shelf to her left. She laughed with one barely oppressed exhale.   
>>Didn’t think there would be that much of a difference depending on the, uh, animal.<<  
>>Well, we are cheating nature. Had you ever tasted human blood, I don’t think you could have even kept that down just now.<<  
>>I almost did.<< she said, her expression stern when she reminded both of them of that incident at the Grimmauld Place.  
>>That was necessary,<<  
>>It was reckless!<< she interrupted before he could even begin to defend their actions, or rather Dumbledore’s.  
>>You should be more than familiar with the concept of recklessness, don’t you think?<< he sneeringly referred to the more or less infamous trait, prominent in most Gryffindors.  
>>Hah!<< she scoffed, >>You really should know better than that, Severus. I mean, it only took me a few weeks to figure it out. Surely you must have known for quite a while now.<<   
>>It is Professor Snape for you still and I can’t say I know what you are alluding to, Miss Johnson.<<   
>>It is embarrassing to witness you betraying your intelligence like that, Professor. A trait that we share, for that matter, just like we do not share the inclination toward reckless behaviour. Do I have to spell it out for you?<< she raised an eyebrow. He clenched his jaw in response.  
Léah took a deep breath in and huffed it out again as to regain her composure and shake the bitterness.  
>>Look, I am sorry, I don’t mean to be disrespectful toward Dumbledore,<<  
>>There better be no but if you are being sincere.<< he spat but she ignored him, still, an apologetic look crawled upon her face.  
>>But: Sometimes I just can’t help but feel like he plays us as pawns in a game we can’t even know for sure is really chess…and I feel stupid for not noticing that it has been this way for years.<< she said shrugging her shoulders.  
He was quiet for what seemed like a while, seemingly carefully considering what he would reveal about his thought, if anything at all.  
>>You should consider the possibility that his lack of explanation serves protecting the ones he values most.<< she opened her mouth, but he cut her off, >>and you should also consider the possibility that you are amongst those people. As intelligent and observant as you might be, your recent behaviour is nothing short of presumptuous. Understandable, yes, but out of place.>>  
Snape’s words hadn’t sound angry, on the contrary, they had been enlightening and most importantly they had been true.

>>So, no rabbit next time...<< she softly repeated his words from before in a stealthily confession of obedient retraction, seeking that common ground again, they had found before.   
She left with a polite nod, registering one corner of his mouth pull up for the duration of a drawn out heartbeat with relief.


	8. Predator and Prey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter a whiile ago and didn't want to share it bc I don't write chronologically and first wanted to close the gaps so to speak. That has proven to be harder than I thougt, somehow so I thouht I might as well just get this one out into the world and maybe it will get my creativity going again.
> 
> Love,  
> Annaleigh <3

>>Hmmm<< she sighed, >>is that…<< he clasped the hands behind his back, >>Fox. I had noticed you seem to like it the best.<< he said sounding suspiciously casual.  
>>It seems I do, yeah…<< she looked at him with a half-smile and if he didn’t know better, he would have thought it to be coy. But both of them knew better.  
It was a dangerously double-edged sword. The better the blood tasted, the better she felt but the greater also became her desire for more.   
She leaned back on her arms to take in the sight in front of her. Lightly she started swaying her crossed legs at the edge of the table, her gaze slowly wandering from his thighs over the straight torso to the crevice of his neck, where she could practically see the blood pumping.   
And suddenly she remembered the first time she had smelled him, his blood on her fingers. Every fibre in her body had simultaneously yearned for that very liquid and fought against that same instinct, that only now did she remember what his scent had been.   
Severus Snape had been drowning saltwater, lashing gusts of cold wind. He had been bitter blackberries and wet birch bark. Just as he was now.

Léah looked him right in the eyes and she could see bright silver flares reflected in black. She felt midnight tendrils crawl up her neck. Something made her stand up to get closer to him in calculating strides.   
>>Any chance that you got some more?<< she asked, theatrical innocence making her words light with wings. She pretended to study the ingredients stacked in the shelf he was still standing next to. There was maybe a casual step of space between them. He didn’t back off, however.   
>>You shouldn’t get greedy.<< he said, studying her profile.   
Léah faced him now, high on the tingling feeling that spread through her body at his scent swirling around her, a provocative grin on her face.  
>>I could also just take what I want…<< she extended one slender hand – he stiffened but didn’t flinch otherwise – and lightly placed it atop that particular space on his neck. She felt the skin beneath rise and fall rhythmically, heard the blood rushing. His pulse was steady. Forcefully so.   
>>Hm. Funny, I remember it somewhat differently, don’t you, Severus?<< she taunted in a sing-song, thinking back to when her hand had lain there before…in a rather deadly grip.  
He clenched his jaw at his name and before she knew what was happening, she found herself seized by the neck, swung around and shoved up against the stone wall to their other side. The air was knocked out of her lunges and for one thrilling second, she couldn’t breathe.  
>>Like this?<< he hissed through his teeth.  
Her look was wild, victorious even. >>Or maybe you would like to take what you want? Something you need.<< He looked furious at what she implied. But he didn’t let go of her. The hand that still was on his throat snaked its way to the back of the neck and tried to lower his head toward her gaze ever so slightly. Léah stretched her chin and now she could feel his suppressed breath on her lips.  
>>Take it, Severus.<< she whispered and extended her sharp tongue to lick over his mouth but barely touching. It made him loosen his grip and although she didn’t know if in shock or invitation, she tilted her head and grazed her teeth over his jaw until they hovered over his vein at the juncture to his neck. She didn’t quite bite down, not enough to draw blood at least. But enough to moan at his amplified scent taking up her senses. She tasted salt and florid bitterness as she dipped her tongue under his jawline. Once. She heard his breath hitch, his heartbeat trip.  
She felt her head being pulled back by a dense grip in her hair, overextending her neck. The hand around her throat was back. Snape glared at her, probably in anger, but she could see his composure wither away and let out a strangled laugh.  
And then she slid her tongue across her teeth, just as she let her mask fall. His eyes widened and she knew that she was now fully Siren, iridescent by unnatural and predatory alluring beauty.   
>>Take me.<< she ordered and revelled in the sight of the last shards of resistance shattering into pieces.

He crashed his lips into hers, one hand fisted her hair the other was wandering to the small of her back to press her up against his body. The kiss was greedy and needy and messy. She licked into his mouth as to devour every flavour of him. She had one hand on the back of his neck again, fingers tangled into strands of black, the other covered his hand on her back to press herself against his groin even more. Then she guided him to the back off her thigh to steady her as she wrapped the leg around his waist. He ground into her making both of them let out a shivering gasp. He was painfully hard by now. She made an effort to stroke him through layers of robes but he caught her wrist and pinned it against the wall above her head. He broke the kiss first, parting only millimetres from her lips.  
She could sense him straining against her influence. Breathing heavy Snape squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head as to clear it of the fog that had settled over his mind.  
Léah could see the strength it took him to extend his arm and move away from her face. When he opened his eyes again Léah could practically see the haze she had cast deteriorate. The predator within let out an annoyed huff >>Spoilsport…<<

>>You really shouldn’t use your powers like that.<< he said, his voice heavy, almost exhausted but still raw from lingering arousal. He wound his hand out of her hair carefully.  
>>I didn’t make you do anything you didn’t want to, really. I only amplified what was already there…<< she said, childish petty almost lending her voice a distinct quiver; trying to control her breathing.  
>>Leave.<< he didn’t look her in the eye, taking another step backward. Her skin stopped tingling and she felt the Siren retrieve from the surface again. She didn’t move for a moment, reconstructing her composure; as he did.   
>>Now!<< he glared at her now. Anger visible in his expression.  
>>See you tomorrow in class, then.<< she shot back, grabbing her bag as she walked past the table and out the door without another look over her shoulder. She heard the locks slam shut behind her.

She didn’t come to class the next day, though. Of course, she didn’t, she felt awful. What the fuck was I thinking?! The answer was, she hadn’t been at all. She had let herself be led by desire. Desire for blood mixed with desire for well, something else entirely. The worst thing was that she couldn’t blame it on that other being within her, because it simply was no longer separated from who she was. It was rather a faintly dormant alter ego that – even when it took the lead by force – was still somewhat under her control.  
So, she tried to avoid Snape as much as she could. She had another problem anyway. Umbridge. That bitch had decided to make Léah the latest object of her attention and not in the good way. To Léah’s growing unease, Umbridge seemed to suspect something. She made suspicious comments about half-breeds, mostly referring to the creatures living in the forbidden forest but she almost always picked Léah to lend insight into the matter. 

>>I don’t even want to know, what she would do, if she somehow found out, that I am not only the cousin of an alleged fugitive mass murderer, the sister of another fugitive psychotic death eater – who is said to be one of Voldemort’s most loyal followers – but also practically adopted by a werewolf.<< she joked half-heartedly.  
>>She would want to throw you straight into Azkaban, no doubt.<< Ron said, encouraging as he was.

//

Léah had missed two meetings with Snape and two potions classes when Hermione urged her to attend class this time. >>You are still just a student, Léah. You could really get into trouble for skipping classes, not to mention fail them. I really don’t think Snape cares that much that you screwed up the last essay.<< So Léah caved and now found herself in that same room again.   
To her relief, Snape didn’t pay her any attention what so ever when he entered the room and walked past her toward his desk. And Léah was very sure that relief should have been the only emotion she felt. But something stung in the place between her heart and throat. She swallowed it down.  
She worked with Infinity, a nice Slytherin girl with chocolate hair and caramel skin. Léah remembered when she was a third year and had had a rather severe crush on Infinity but never the courage to speak to her. But she was easy to be around, uncomplicated and effortlessly likeable. It was nice working next to each other in pleasant silence for the first few minutes, both of them cutting and measuring ingredients for their restoration potion.

>>I almost didn’t recognize you. I think we had arythmancy together last year, right? Léah, was it?<< she started casually, giving her a curious smile.  
>>Yes, we did. And yes, that’s right. You are Infinity.<< she stated awkwardly and suddenly felt like that young and shy thirteen-year-old again and it was enchantingly distracting from whom she had to become. Infinity huffed, amused.  
>>Looks good on you though…<< she said, adding a pinch of ground bone marrow into their steaming caldron. There was a teasing hue in her voice that didn’t escape Léah’s notice. Because it wasn’t supposed to. >>What exactly?<< she returned, glancing at her through ebony lashes, knowing very well what she was doing.  
>>Well, everything to be fair.<< they both laughed.   
A sneering voice cut through the steam of their boiling potion. >>Concentrate on your assignment, Miss Clarence.<< Snape didn’t even bother to look up from the papers he was grading. Infinity looked genuinely worried for a moment but lightened up when Léah rolled her eyes theatrically and gave her a comforting wink.  
>>Would you, maybe, like to grab a butter beer or something sometime this week?<< Infinity whispered after they had worked quietly for the following twenty minutes.  
>>Yeah, I would like that. Very much actually<<

Infinity was roses and vanilla, like summer in November. Her kisses were chaste, her caresses sincere. She was good. And Léah was not. She felt guilty about that sometimes, Infinity truly deserved better.

>>So… you and that Slytherin girl huh?<< Harry said with a smirk on his face. >>Her name is Infinity, Harry. And I think it is lovely. You two are really emphasizing what Hogwarts is all about. Community. And togetherness that is not separated by boundaries of the different houses, you know? Absolutely lovely.<< Hermione rambled as if she was scared anyone would have anything negative to say and of course nobody did. It still made Léah’s heart flutter.


End file.
